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The ideas and rituals of marriage seem to contradict themselves. The community I grew up in was very small. Because of this, everyone was always aware of any divorces or marital issues among couples. I seemed like divorce in my community was very rare. When there were divorces, everyone was completely shocked and it was hot gossip that spread through the town like wildfire. I definitely grew up believing that divorce was not an option and that one would be shamed if they did decide to divorce their spouse, just like the letter A that Hester Prynne was forced to wear in Nathanial Hawthorn’s The Scarlet Letter.  Now as I am studying the State of our Unions article about marriage trends in America today, I am realizing that divorce is much more common than I ever realized, and that it can affect the dynamics of each family that goes through this. Divorce can often happen based upon fleeting feelings and rash decisions when emotions are high, but they can also be the best decision in a bad situation. Whatever the reason, they both contribute to the statistic that shows that half of marriages end in divorce.
If I was having a conversation with someone about the LDS church’s views on marriage, the family, and divorce, I would begin by telling them that the church highly values the sanctity of the family. The church also values the covenants made through the bonds of marriage. Although these things are true, the church knows that there are circumstances when it is necessary for a marriage to end. As members of the church, we are not asked to remain in a marriage that is damaged beyond repair. We are counseled to keep the commandments, keep the covenants we’ve made with God, and raise our children to be happy and healthy. Divorce might happen, even while we are doing those things. And that is okay!

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